Oh, how I
loved “Gilligan’s Island” as a child! It was already in repeats when I discovered
it, but I loved the idea of a group of strangers being trapped on an uncharted
desert island and having to rely on each other for their survival. Sound like
the show “Lost”? It wasn’t. There were no “Others” or polar bears on this
island, thankfully. But they DID have the Professor to invent things like a
metal-barrel-washing-machine, powered by pedaling on a bicycle or a battery
charger made out of coconut shells. And when everyone needed entertainment,
they had the beautiful Ginger, an actress who for some reason, went on a
supposed three-hour boat tour wearing an evening gown! (Oh, the sitcoms of the
70s.) With Ginger’s expertise, the cast could mount shows, particularly if a
theater producer just happened to wash up on shore. (Yes, that happened in one
of the episodes). How fortunate this theater producer was to catch their
production of “Hamlet”, set to the music of the opera “Carmen”. Check out a
clip here:
And finally
we get to the heart of the matter, with lyrics sung loudly and proudly by the
Skipper and later with the entire cast: “Neither a lender, nor a borrower be.
Do not forget, stay out of debt.” Oh, if only I had heeded the Skipper’s sage
advice! I have been in debt for as long as I can remember. And I’m not talking
about student or car loans, or even a mortgage. To me, all of those things are
GOOD debt. You’re getting something out of it, once it’s all paid off. When I
say debt, I mean credit cards… those evil, EVIL pieces of plastic that most of
us can’t seem to live without. Or at least I haven’t been able to. The ironic
thing is, I should be preening like a peacock right about now. This Friday, I
make my final payment on a debt consolidation plan I started about four and a
half years ago which totaled a whopping $37,000. That’s right… $37,000.
And I paid it ALL off while also paying for a car. (A car being the good debt,
remember?) It’s hard for me to conceive
of how I got into that much debt. What the hell did I spend $37,000 on,
exactly? I have no idea. Stuff, apparently.
So yes, I
am super proud that I diligently paid $840/month instead of declaring
bankruptcy. I bask in the glow of knowing that I finally DID it. That is, until
I remember that I actually HAVEN’T done it. Not yet, anyway. I have MORE debt
to pay off in the New Year. And no, it isn’t a car loan. (That’s paid off too.)
I am ashamed to admit it is MORE credit card debt. See, while I was working on
paying off my consolidated debt, I was still accumulating NEW debt. Silly me
kept a few credit cards on hand for emergencies only. And in my defense, my play
was in the Fringe Festival a couple of years ago and it cost a pretty penny!
Credit cards come in handy when you’re self-producing a show, believe me. But
honestly, I can’t even remember what else was such an emergency that I needed to fund it with “fake” money. Ah, it
seems so exciting to swipe that card in the heat of the moment, knowing you’re
buying something you really WANT. But do you really NEED it, is more the
question. Like I said, I can’t remember! And I am not alone… so many people I
know are in credit card hell. One of my coworkers tried to comfort me by saying
when you’re an artist things come up. You take an acting job that doesn’t pay a
lot of money, so you have to buy food on a credit card. Or there’s a class you
HAVE to take with an industry professional you HAVE to meet. Sure, there are
all kinds of scenarios we can come up with to justify bad spending habits. The
bottom line is, if your debt is so high you can’t pay it back within a few
months, you are doing something TERRIBLY WRONG.
I don’t
want to live in regret. What a waste of energy that is! What’s done is done. And
for the record, my current credit card debt is nowhere near the debt I am
paying off this Friday. It’s just important to note what happened once can
happen again. Because it clearly did. Now, I must move forward and recognize
there is another way. And it will involve
really asking myself what I want
versus what I need. Those lines get
blurred very easily, especially when you have that evil piece of plastic to
provide the answer for you. “No” has always been a hard thing for me to say – to
other people as well as to myself. But it’s something that must become my
mantra. “No, I don’t need that.” “No, I don’t have to do that.” “No, that’s too
expensive.” These must become my catch phrases. And it’s hard to acknowledge
you can’t have everything, because I’ve always been a dreamer who tells
everyone that you CAN. In dreams, anything is possible, and we should all have
a little bit of a dreamer in us. It keeps us going and inspires us to take
chances. When it comes to money, however, I think a little less risk taking is
in order. The buck needs to stop HERE and by here, I mean my wallet!
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